


Eclipse

by amelia_kate



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 1970s, Animagus, Gryffindor, Hogwarts, Hufflepuff, LGBTQ Themes, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Metamorphmagus, Multi, Quidditch, Ravenclaw, Slytherin, The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-12 00:46:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28876668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amelia_kate/pseuds/amelia_kate
Summary: Everyone has shit they wish they could forget. But what not many people have, is someone who makes them want to remember.Or the one where the moon fell in love with the sun and the stars couldn't have shined any brighter.Disclaimer, I do not own the rights to any of the Harry Potter characters or universe, only to my original characters and their stories.[RemusxOC][LGBTQ+]
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Remus Lupin/Original Female Character(s), Sirius Black/Kingsley Shacklebolt
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	1. Welcome Home

_•••_

_The speckled wild flowers that danced so effortlessly in the breeze caught the attention of a young girl with their mesmerizing colors. She stumbled out of her old english stone cottage that she shared with her small family. The grass softly tickled her bare feet as she ran out of the door, leaving it open carelessly which she knew her mother would scold her for later though she didn't care as she let herself be swept into the summer warmth, the sunlight kissing her young skin with adoration._

_The girl lost her footing and tripped, crashing down onto her knees with a soft thud. She didn't seem to mind as now she was closer to the flowers which captivated her. Her white dress flowed in the summer breeze as a small butterfly danced around her gracefully before flying off into the woods that surrounded her. She watched the butterfly for a moment, an innocent smile plastered on her round cheeks, before turning her attention back towards the wild flowers that sat beneath her._

_And as she reached her small hand to pluck one of the daisies that sat snugly in the long grass that was long overdue for a trim, her chocolate curls turned into a bubblegum pink color and a wide smiled grew on her face._

_"Cassiopeia!" She heard the faint voice of her mother call from where she stood in the doorway, a large grin plastered on her aging face and a beige envelope with a red seal clutched tightly in her hand._

_Cassiopeia knew instantly what the letter her mother was holding meant and who it was from._

_"Is...is that?" She asked, her voice quiet._

_"Yes! It came!"_

_•••_

"Cas! If you don't get your arse down here _RIGHT_ now I'm going to shove my foot so far up your-"

"Damn Marls, no need to get all aggressive," Cassie teased, a cheeky smile plastered on her rosy cheeks.

"Oh shut up Cassie just get your arse down here, we're already late!" Marlene huffed, flipping her blonde curls over her shoulder dramatically.

"I'm here I'm here," Cassiopea smiled, bouncing down the old wooden staircase which creaked under her weight.

"You have everything dears?" Marlene's mother asked, peaking her head from out of the kitchen with a warm smile spread across her face.

"Yes mum, now we really have to go we'll miss the bloody train!" Marlene exclaimed, urgency laced in her words.

"Yes Mrs.McKinnon. And I just wanted to say thank you again for letting me stay these past weeks," Cassie smiled sincerely, "I've had so much fun and you've been nothing but kind and welcoming to me and er well I know I can kind of be a handful but I can't tell you how much it means to me and my mum that you let me stay here while she's off in the states and-"

"Love, you are always welcome here. But not right now because you have a train to catch!" Mrs.McKinnon laughed, hugging the two fifteen year olds tightly and placing a gentile kiss on each of their foreheads.

"Are you sure you can't come with us to the platform?" Marlene pouted.

"I'm sorry Marls, but I have to get to work and you two better get going, there's a taxi waiting for you outside and I think if you take any longer he might just drive off without you," she smiled.

"Thank you Mrs.McKinnon, really," Cassie smiled as she followed Marlene hurriedly out of the front door.

"Call me Melissa!" The two girls heard Mrs.McKinnon call after them as they scrambled into the back of the taxi, apologizing profusely for how long the driver had been waiting. Though, neither of their apologies were genuine as they were both much to excited to think of anything other than the start of their much anticipated (and equally as dreaded), fifth year and finally being able to see their friends once again.

The car ride to the platform was agonizingly slow, and Cassie couldn't help but let her mind flutter back to the memories she made throughout her years at Hogwarts, alongside her friends.

Ever since she bumped into a group of four scruffy boys on the train in her first year, the five had become inseparable, dubbing themselves the marauders which was a result of a pirate joke made by one of the members, Remus Lupin, hence the (albeit slightly odd), nickname for the five friends.

It had become somewhat of a comfort for the rest of the Hogwarts students to always see the four Gryffindors and their beloved Hufflepuff laughing the day away, messing with each other and causing mischief at any chance they got.

The five had quickly gained the title of Hogwarts' resident pranksters, and lord did they live up to that title.

James Potter, an eternally messy-haired romantic who had an unhealthy obsession with the Gryffindor beauty Lily Evans ever since he met her in his first year, was the first to befriend Cassie in their first year, and as a result he had formed a brotherly bond with the young metamorphmagus, and although he would never actually admit it, the prankster loved her more than life itself and he was certain he would die for her in a heartbeat. While his love for Cassiopea was much more subtle and quiet then her affection towards him, they both had a mutual understanding that either of them would walk to the ends of the earth for each other.

Similarly to James, Sirius Black, a devilishly handsome angsty troublemaker, quickly befriended Cassie in their first year. Sirius thought of her as a younger sister and would defend her till the end of time, which he had done many times throughout their years as friends. And while Cassie would always scold him for picking fights with her bullies, saying she could handle herself, she couldn't deny the warm fuzzy feeling in her heart whenever she would hear of how he defended her against a bunch of pricks. And while Cassie had a very close sibling-like bond with James, Sirius and Cassie were arguably closer, always being able to find comfort in each other whenever they were having family troubles as both were the only ones in the group with a broken family past that they wouldn't dare burden their other friends with, though they could always find solace in the hugs they traded with each other in the astronomy tower.

Next was Remus Lupin, definitively Cassie's closest friend and confidant, a lanky werewolf. His face had always had "an adorably dorky," look plastered on his freckled cheeks. And while Cassie had considered James and Sirius as brothers, there was something different in her and Remus' relationship, something warm and inviting. A feeling that neither of them could seem to explain no matter how hard or for how long they thought about it, staying up into the late hours of the night simply pondering the strange feelings they felt. When the pair weren't beating themselves up about their unfamiliar feelings, they would be found huddled together in the Library, cuddling in the Gryffindor common room, playing wizard's chess in the Hufflepuff common room, wandering around in the Forbidden Forest, or simply enjoying each others presence as they wandered the dark halls in the late hours of the night.

Lastly was Peter Pettigrew, a small mousy boy who was often found trailing behind James and Sirius like a lost puppy. Even though Peter himself was kind, gentile, and very lovable, his insecurities tended to get the better of him, sending him to the back of the crowd. And Cassie simply wouldn't stand for that. So, over the years, Cassie had made it her personal mission to build up her friend's confidence and scold James and Sirius whenever they made him feel small or un-welcomed.

Cassiopea was, undoubtedly, the most careful out of the group, often acting as James and Sirius' impulse control alongside an exasperated Remus. And even though she was often the most responsible, half the pranks they pulled were arguably her brilliant ideas that she took pride in. Her pranks were always harmless and light-hearted as she couldn't handle the guilt of actually ruining someone's day, the only problem was Sirius and James' pranks were the complete opposite, especially to a greasy-haired Severus Snape, affectionately nicknamed "Snivilus" by none other than dumbass one and dumbass two.

Despite their flaws and their petty arguments, the five would do anything for each other. They loved each other deeply, even illegally becoming unregistered animagi in their fourth year.   
  
  


_"What the hell are you guys talking about?" Remus asked, his brows furrowed as he stared at the old dusty book clutched harshly in James' hands._

_"Remmy look, we've done it! We've figured it out!" Sirius enthused, flipping the pages of the book quickly, landing on the one he and James had been looking for._

_"Holy shit did you guys actually figure it out?" Cassie asked, her hazel eyes wide and her mouth hanging open slightly._

_"Yes!" Peter exclaimed, a wind grin spread across his round cheeks._

_"Wait what?" Remus asked, "no no no no! I thought I told you guys to drop it!?"_

_"Well technically..." James began._

_"No! Absolutely not! I'm I-I'm not going to let you guys risk your lives for me...I-I'm not worth it. I'm a monster," Remus said, his voice soft and broken._

_"Remus, look at me," Cass commanded, placing her small hand on his scarred cheek, forcing his gaze up to her face._

_"Do you remember in second year when you told us about your moon problem?" She asked, a hint of amusement lacing her words as she looked deeply into his chocolate colored eyes._

_He nodded._

_"Do you remember how after I found out and did some research and learned that the only way for you not to hurts yourself once a month was if you had an animal present during your transformation, I spent the whole rest of the fucking year figuring out how to change myself into an animal?" She asked._

_He nodded slowly._

_"Well do you remember how when I told you what I was doing, you flipped out and got all pissy about it?"_

_"Yeah..."_

_"So, you remember how I gave you this long ass speech about how dramatic you were being and that I loved you too much not to do everything I could to help?"_

_"...yes."_

_"So, do you remember how the night of the full moon, after I had perfected turning myself into a fox, you started arguing with me, telling me to leave and that you would kill me, maim me, hurt me, turn me into a monster like you?" She asked._

_"Yeah, I do," he admitted sheepishly, a pink tint to his freckled cheeks._

_"Well, then you must remember what happened next don't you," she smirked._

_He nodded, his face flushed._

_"I punched you because you were being a dramatic asshole and if you don't shut the fuck up right now and let us tell you about how cool we would all be as animagi I'm going to punch you again," Cassie laughed softly._

_"But I'm serious, I-I don't want to hurt you guys..." Remus whispered, his voice soft and hoarse._

_"No, I'm Sirius," Sirius grinned cheekily._

_"Rems, we love you and we're not going to let you go through this alone," Peter smiled softly._

_"But-" Remus interjected, a pleading look in his eyes._

_"No Remus we already made up our mind," James demanded, his voice unusually stern._

_There was a long silence as Remus hung his head low in contemplation before looking back up to his friends with hot tears prickling at his chocolate eyes._

_"Thank you," he whispered sadly, a soft bittersweet smile tugging at his scarred lips._  
  
  


"Cassie? Hello Earth to Cassie?" Marlene asked, waving her hand frantically in front of Cassie's face, effectively snapping her out of her memories and bringing her back down to reality.

"Sorry I just-"

"Spaced out for a second?" Marlene and Lily snickered.

Cassie simply offered the two girls a bashful smile as the roots of her dark brown curls morphed into a pale yellow.

"What were you thinking about?" Emmaline Vance, a fifth year Hufflepuff with strikingly raven hair and deep brown eyes, asked softly.

"Oh just er thinking about the guys you know?I haven't seen them yet and I've been staying with Marls for like the whole summer so I like really miss them," Cassie smiled.

"Why were you staying at Marlene's?" Dorcas Meadows, a fifth year Gryffindor with curls similar to Cassie's, asked bluntly, tilting her head slightly out of confusion.

Cassie had always admired Dorcas' bluntness, something she could never seem to master and stuck to speaking in vague riddles when delivering bad news or asking a question that she tip toed around.

"Oh my mum had to go to America for t-work. She just had to go on some business trip," Cass shrugged, mentally cursing herself for her almost slip of tongue.

"What does she do again?" Emmaline asked.

"She works for the ministry, department of mysteries, she's never allowed to tell me anything it's honestly so fucking annoying," Cassie sighed softly.

"My dad never tells me shit either," Dorcas laughed lightly, her voice carrying throughout the compartment, warming the hearts of her friends.

"I have to go do prefect rounds but I'll be back in like half an hour okay?" Lily asked, getting up out of her seat and dusting off her uniform.

"Okay bye Lils!" Cass and Marlene yelled after the red headed girl as she danced happily down the halls, her prefect badge sitting proudly on the outside of her robes.

"I'm going to go find the guys and say hi, I'll only be a few minutes Marls," Cassie giggled to herself, brushing off the glare being sent her way by her blonde friend.

Cassiopea bounced down the hallway, her chocolate curls morphing into a pale pink as she allowed a small smile to spread across her full lips with the thought of seeing her friends once again.

It only took her a few minutes to reach the compartment that the five of them had humbly laid claim to at the end of their first year, dubbing it "the marauders compartment", making it known to every student that it was rightfully theirs and any one to sit there without permission from the five owners, would result in an overdramatic tantrum performed by none other than the drama kings themselves, James and Sirius.

"Cass!"

Her head shot up at the sound of her friends, her smile growing wider and her hair turning a darker shade of pink.

"Hey guys," she laughed as the four boys pulled her into the compartment, causing her to stumble over and fall onto Sirius' lap.

"Oh well hello darling, I thought perhaps we would go on a date first but I mean-" Sirius teased, shooting the girl one of his signature winks as she pushed herself off of his lap and into the empty seat next to Remus.

"I can't believe you would cheat on me!?" James exclaimed, throwing his hand dramatically over his heart.

"I'm sorry you had to find out this way," Sirius sighed.

"And with the baby on the way!? How long has this been going on!?" James demanded, holding his stomach as if he were pregnant.

"About two months," Sirius whispered, hanging his head in mock shame.

"You!" He pointed to Cassie, "how could you?"

"Maybe if you were better in bed he wouldn't have cheated," she teased, knowing it was usually better to just go along with their little acts rather than sit there being annoyed.

"How dare you!? I'll have you know I'm _amazing_ in bed, isn't that right Padfoot?" James asked, puffing his chest out proudly.

"Well..."

"Moony, back me up here!" James pleaded.

"Me!? Why the fuck would I know how good you are in bed!?" Remus exclaimed, a disgusted look spread across his scarred cheeks.

"Something you need to tell us boys?" Cassie teased, gesturing between James and Remus.

"No!" Both the boys yelled, causing the compartment to explode into a fit of laughter with Cassie laughing the loudest.

"Okay okay, enough of that, how were your summers?" Cassie asked, her cheeks flushed and her hair a pale pink color.

"Boring," Peter grumbled, "I was stuck home alone the whole time because Moony was off being depressed-"

"I'm not depressed Wormtail."

"Yeah yeah sure, but I was stuck all alone while Sirius and James were off with each other together having sex or whatever they do," Peter grumbled, earning a few silent snickers from his friends.

"And?" Cassie asked, her hair now its usual chocolate color.

"And _you_ were off with Marlene the whole bloody summer!" Peter exclaimed, throwing his arms up in the air for emphasis.

"It wasn't my fault!" Cassie exclaimed, a soft smile tugging at her lips.

"You should've just come over to my place! Or Moony's so you two could finally confess your undying love for each other," Peter yelled, a large grin spread across his round cheeks.

"Our undying love for each other?" Cassie asked, an amused smirk on her face as she turned to face an equally amused Remus.

"Red?" Remus asked, a mock serious tone lacing his words.

"Yes?" She asked, turning her body to face him fully, batting her eyelashes dramatically.

"Will...will you, Cassiopea Luna Waters, do me the honor of being my wife?" Remus asked.

"Oh Moony!" She exclaimed, "I thought you would never ask!"

"Is that a yes?" Remus asked, unable to contain his smile as he heard the laughs of the other marauders.

"Yes! Yes! A thousand times yes!" She laughed.

"I love you Cassie!" He laughed, pulling her into a hug, only increasing the laughter throughout the compartment.

"This feels like foreshadowing," Sirius teased.

"Moony and Red? No way," James laughed loudly, brushing off the statement with the wave of his hand.

"Why? You fancy Remus?" Cassie asked, a teasing smirk tugging at her lips.

"We're still on that?" James groaned.

"Can I paint your nails?" Cassie asked, turning to face a confused Remus.

"Er why?" He asked, tilting his head slightly in confusion, making him look similar to a lost puppy.

She simply shrugged and tuned back into the conversation the other three were having, leaving Remus to stare at her, his brows furrowed as he tried to figure out why the fuck she would want to paint his nails.

"Aren't you supposed to be doing prefect duties right now?" Peter asked, eying his friend curiously.

_"Oh shit!"_

•••

"Why did you want to paint my nails?" Remus asked, his voice low as James, Sirius, and Peter slept, their limbs intertwined messily.

"Huh?" She asked, her voice equally as soft as not to wake her sleeping friends.

"Earlier, you asked me if you could paint my nails," Remus responded.

"Dunno," she shrugged, "I just felt like it."

"You just felt like it?"

"Yeah I mean I always paint Marlene's nails and Lily's sometimes and I realized I've never painted your nails."

"Why would you want to though? I'm a guy?"

"So?"

"Er well guys don't really wear nail polish..."

"Life's too boring if you do whatever everyone else does."

"Do you want to paint my nails?"

"Well no shit."

"Black."

"What?"

"Can you paint them black?"

"Wait you're actually gonna let me paint your nails?"

"If it means your hair's gonna stay that cute pink color it is right now, then fuck yeah go ahead."

"You're so easy Lupin."

_Only for you Cassie._

"I know."  
  



	2. Snivelus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: Homophobia, homophobic slur, vague mentions of child abuse

***

By the time the Hogwarts Express had reached Hogsmeade station, Remus and Sirius were both sporting a freshly painted set of black nails, courtesy to a very pleased Cassie. 

James however, was not so pleased. 

"I don't understand why you didn't want to paint _my_ nails!" James exclaimed as the five teenagers trudged through Hogsmeade station in search of an empty carriage. 

"You were sleeping!" Cassie yelled, throwing her arms up in the air in frustration, shooting daggers to the other three boys who were having a very hard time containing their laughter. 

"So was Sirius!"

"He woke up!"

"Why didn't you wake me up then!?"

"Why on Earth would I ever think you would want your nails painted!?"

"Why wouldn't I!?"

"Why are you so bloody upset!? I can paint your fucking nails when we get inside if you want to so badly!"

"It's not the fact you _didn't_ paint my nails! It's the fact you didn't _want_ to!"

"Why would that matter though!?"

"Of course it matters!"

"Why?"

"You wanted to paint Moony's nails and Padfoots! What about me and Wormy?"

"Pete? You both want your nails painted?"

"Nope no no no, leave me out of this shit, absolutely not," Peter snickered. 

"Wait why not? I could paint them black like Remus' and Sirius'!" She grinned, her chocolate curls morphing from a fiery red color back to their natural brown color. 

"You want to paint his nails but not mine!?" James asked, his jaw slack as he stared shell shocked at his Hufflepuff friend. 

"Here we go again," Remus sighed, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. 

"Shut up Moony!" James and Cassie snapped in unison before turning back to each other, glaring daggers at one another. _If looks could kill,_ Remus thought.

"Look James, I'll paint your nails during the feast okay? I'll even sit with you tossers instead of with Marls and Emma deal?" She asked, trying her hardest not to let her annoyance show. 

"Fine but can you paint them red? Like Gryffindor?" He asked, an adorably innocent grin spread across his face. 

"De-" She began, but before she could finish her thought, a snide voice interrupted her. 

"Eurgh," the voice gagged, "a bunch of fucking queers."

The group instantly went stiff, the tension thick, hanging in the air around them like a storm cloud you simply couldn't rid yourself of. 

Slowly, the five marauders turned around, scowls plastered on each of their faces as they turned only to be faced with a sneering, greasy haired Snape standing before them, surrounded by two other Slytherins who were significantly larger than him, acting as what Cassie assumed must be some sort of body guards. She recognized the tallest of the group to be a fifth year Slytherin named Mulicber, she had never had the energy to find out his first name, not that it mattered she supposed. But she didn't recognize the second who was significantly smaller than Muliciber, yet still somehow taller and buffer than Snape. His hair was a light sandy brown and his eyes were warm and inviting. She hoped he was kinder than most Slytherins she had the pleasure (well, more like displeasure...), of meeting, though while there's a first time for everything, she assumed he wouldn't be any kinder than the company he kept. 

"Snivellus," Sirius greeted, his voice cold and his eyebrows pinched. 

"Black," Snape sneered, the name rolled of his tongue as if he were disgusted by the word. 

"The fuck did you just say?" Cassie asked, her hair a violent shade of red as she took a few steps closer to the taller boy, glaring up at him and his bodyguards. 

Sirius and James exchanged an uneasy glance before returning their attention back to the standoff in front of them. 

"What?" Snape glowered, "gone deaf have you?"

"I'd watch your mouth Snape," she snapped, despite her anger towards the boy, she still refused to call him "Snivellus". 

"Or what? Gonna hex me?" He teased, "the fuck are _you_ gonna do? The freak and her pathetic group of homos."

"Insult me all you want," she sneered, her hair turning a brilliant shade of crimson and she was sure her eyes had as well, "but keep my friends out of your filthy fucking mouth."

"Oh yeah?" Mulicber smirked. 

"Or what?" Snape asked. 

James glared at them. "Get lost Snivillus."

"You don't tell me what to do, filthy bloodtraitor."

"Oh? Don't I?"

"I don't know what she sees in filth like you."

"The fuck are you talking about?" Sirius asked, his hands clenched in fists at his side. 

Snape relished in the rise he was getting out of Sirius and James "Just imagine what she'll say when I tell her all about _Potter_..."

"What about me?" James snapped. 

Snape simply smirked cruelly, Cassie knew what was coming next and instinctively took a step in front of James. 

"Just wait till I tell her all about how you're a fucking queer. Imagine how she'll take that hm?"

James gasped, Sirius had to be held back by Remus. "Take that back!"

"That's the best you got?" Cassie challenged, ignoring the fuming boys behind her, "calling someone a queer? Really?"

She scanned the faces of the three Slytherins towering over her, her face blank as she examined their's. Mulicber was sneering down at her. _Nothing new_ , she thought. Snape was, as usual, glaring daggers at her and the four boys behind her. The smaller brunette however wasn't glaring or sneering, no, his head was tilted slightly and his brows furrowed as he stared intently at Cassie, seemingly trying to figure something out. She could've swore she saw the wheels turning in his brain as he studied her, her face, her posture, every small detail about her. It was unnerving. 

"What? You one too then?" Mulciber asked, his tone cold and his words laced with venom. 

She rolled her eyes. "One what Mulciber?" 

"A fucking queer is it? Don't tell me the freak's one too," Snape sneered. 

"Oh yeah? A freak and a queer?" She challenged. 

Snape laughed dryly. "Why else would you stick around these lot of poofs? Surely a mudblood freak like you ought to have a _little_ respect for herself."

"A mudblood freak like me?" 

Her voice was dangerously calm as she took a few steps closer to the raven haired boy. The boys behind her shared an amused glance with each other, the knew what was happening next and none of them were in any hurry to stop her. 

"You might want to shut your filthy fucking mouth right about now," she threatened. 

"Oh yeah?" Snape mused, "and why's that Waters?"

And with all the strength she could muster, her fist went flying through the air, socking Snape in his abnormally large hooked nose, crimson blood staining her nuckles as the boy in front of her fell onto the cold ground. 

Mulciber and the sandy haired boy stood there for a moment, staring at the small girl in front of them in shock. 

Cassiopea smirked as she hopped into the carriage, careful not to bump into the black winged horse that ed the carriages. 

"Bloody hell."

***

"Bloody hell! You did what!?" Lily asked, her voice high and shrill as she stared wide eyed at her best friend. 

"Lils he was being an absolute arse-"

"Lily Flower, Snivellus deserved it!" James argued. 

"No! You're all horrible! He's bleeding Cassie!" Lily yelled, causing a few nearby students to twist around in their seats to witness her outburst. 

"Lily he was being homophobic!" Cassie argued, her eyes pleading and her curls a light grey color which contrasted the crimson red of the Gryffindor table drastically. 

"That doesn't mean you should punch him!" Lily snapped, her deep emerald eyes seemingly darkening. 

"Lils he was being such a prick," Cassie pleaded. 

Lily sighed deeply, standing up out of her spot on the bench and turning to walk away, stopping only for a moment. "I-you're not like them...I t-thought you were different."

Her voice was so quiet that Cassie thought she misheard her at first, though with a glance to the rest of her friends at the table, scanning over their sympathetic expressions, she realized she had heard Lily correctly, and she deeply regretted bloodying up Severus' nose, even if he did bloody deserve it. 

"Cass-" Remus began, his voice soft and kind, similar to the voice she adopted whenever she comforted him during their late nights in the hospital wing. 

Cassie stood up, muttering a quick "not hungry," before pushing past the rest of the Gryffindors and walking swiftly out of the Great Hall. 

***

After about half an hour of absent-mindedly wandering the empty corridors of the castle, Cassie found herself standing in front of the entrance to the kitchens.

She smiled sadly to herself as she lifted her hand up to the portrait of the pear, tickled it, and climbed through the small opening into the kitchens where she was graciously welcomed by a few eager house elves. 

She sat herself up on the old wooden countertop, her feet dangling off the side, and picked slowly at the piece of apple pie she accepted from the elves. 

Not only ten minutes had passed before the portrait swung open once more to reveal...nothing. 

She scrunched up her nose and furrowed her brows in confusion, peering over her shoulder at the empty room as the portrait closed once again. 

Suddenly, a wave of realization washed over her and she rolled her eyes, a small smile creeping onto her round cheeks. 

"Padfoot or Moony?" She asked. 

The seemingly invisible culprit was no longer invisible, instead, standing in the open space, a sheepish looking Remus smiled at her as he removed the invisibility cloak from off of his back, stretching slightly to his full height as he no longer had to hunch over so the cloak would cover his lanky frame. 

"How did you know?" He asked, smiling cheekily.

She smiled. "Who else would it be?"

"Er well I just-"

"Wanted to come check on me?"

"Er yeah kinda but I-I'm not pitying you!" He rambled. 

"Okay. You're here to cheer me up then?"

"Er if you _want_ cheering up yeah..."

She shrugged. 

"Can I sit?"

"Yeah."

The two of them sat in a comfortable silence for a few minutes, the elves had brought Remus his own piece of apple pie which he ate hurriedly, not wanting to have a mouth full of pie when Cassie decided to start talking, _if_ she decided to start talking.

Cassie was the first to break the silence, refusing to meet his eyes as she spoke. "I thought of him."

"Him?"

"My dad."

"Oh."

"Yeah." She frowned, "he used to say shit like that all the time I don't...I don't know what came over me I-I hate violence."

"It's okay. I'm sure Lily will get over it in a day or two."

"I suppose."

"Do you- er do you want me to get Sirius? I know he's usually the one you go to when you wanna talk about your...family..."

She shrugged. "No it's okay. I-I don't really wanna talk to him about it right now it feels...selfish in a way..."

"Selfish? Why?"

"Well he's going through a lot with his family right now and..."

"And what?"

"Well his stuff is happening _now_. My shit happened a long time ago."

"That doesn't mean it doesn't still affect you all the same."

"I guess."

"Do you-er do you wanna talk about it?"

"Er-"

"Your family I mean..."

"Oh."

"You don't have to...I really can go get Sirius if you want, neither of us mind."

"No, no it's okay I um, yeah I can talk about it..."

"Okay."

"Well er how much do you know? I never really talk about... _him_..."

"Honestly I don't know much..." Remus began, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, "I know he was shit, did a lot of fucked up shit. I know he's in Azkaban now. I know you live with your mum and no one else. I know your room's absolutely adorable-"

She giggled quietly at that. 

"I know," he continued, a soft smile resting on his lips, "I know you don't like talking about it because you don't like feeling like a burden-"

_Oh._

"I know your mum is an angel. She's a lot like you actually. She was a Hufflepuff right?"

Cassie smiled. "Yeah, she was."

"That's kinda it...I know Sirius knows more and Marlene and I don't mind. It's your shit and you get to decide who to tell and when."

"I guess I've never really told you anything..." She grimaced, suddenly feeling incredibly guilty for hiding such a big part of her life. 

"It's okay rea-"

"What do you want to know?" She asked suddenly, turning in her spot to face Remus, his kind eyes staring softly right back at her. 

"Okay well...um why did he get locked up? I know it was something really bad but I've never wanted to ask..."

"It's okay..." She began, turning away from him once again with a small frown, "he um hurt some people."

"Oh."

"...Yeah."

"He didn't hurt you right? You were only twelve..."

"Oh um no..."

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Don't cover for him."

"I'm no-"

"Yes, I've been friends with you and Sirius long enough to know what covering for someone sounds like."

"I-"

"You don't have to tell me...But you can't pretend what he did, what happened to you, didn't happen. Trust me, it doesn't help to ignore it."

"Oh."

"You're safe."

"I know, I'm at Hogwarts, I'm with you guys-"

"You're safe from him."

She turned to look at him, her eyes wide and a small frown tugging at her lips. Her hair had morphed into a pale blue color, a color she hoped Remus would never see. 

Staring into his chocolate colored eyes, the warm inviting scent of chocolate and old textbooks, Cassie wanted so desperately to tell him everything. Tell him how much hurt she had been through. How much hurt she was going through. 

But she quickly shook that thought from her head, of course she couldn't tell him! What would he even say to all of that? There's nothing he could do anyways.

No, Cassie couldn't, she wouldn't be telling Remus anything. He knew just as much as Sirius now...well maybe not _quite_ as much...

She couldn't tell Remus about _him_. About what he did. How would she even begin to explain why the simple thought of her father left a bad taste in her mouth? He would never understand. Not even Sirius fucking Black would understand. What would they think? They would pity her and she would be damned if anyone ever pitied her.

A soft voice spoke to her, speaking her darkest thoughts. The voice always seemed to come at the worst of times...

_They would try to help. Of course they would you daft shit, they're Gryffindor's, they want to be the hero. They don't care, they wouldn't care no matter what you said. James surely wouldn't understand, his life is perfect. And Peter would try to understand, but he's never been good with this kind of thing, he never really knows what to say. And Sirius might understand, but he's dealing with his own shit, there's no need to bother him with your stupid little family drama. It happened years ago. His stuff is happening NOW. And Remus... How could he understand? What would he think? Would he look at her the same? With the same warmness that he was looking at her right now if he found out what happened to her...what she did?_

_No, you can't tell them. You can never tell them. You've known this, you made this decision years ago. Nothing would be the same if you told them, and right now you really just need everything to stay the same don't you?_

Cassie felt the all to familiar feeling of warmth prickling at her eyes.

_God, you're gonna cry now? How pathetic. You're going to cry about you dear old daddy to a werewolf. To your friend who rips himself apart once a month. Selfish._

So, Cassie decided definitively, she wouldn't be spilling all her secrets to the lanky werewolf sitting in front of her, no matter how much she might want to. No, instead she decided on a hug. Yes, a hug would be fine. 

And so, without so much as another word, Cassie leaned over and buried her face in the crook of his neck, her hands balled up in fists around his wool sweater. 

He sat there for a moment, confused, before wrapping his long arms around her small frame, pulling her in closer, their bodies merged into one. 

They stayed holding each other close for a while, Remus' chin resting on the mop of pale blue curls, tickling his face softly as he relished in the feeling of holding her, taking in the oh so familiar scent of cinnamon and coffee. 


	3. Bowtruckle

***

The following week since Cassie had clocked Severus Snape in the nose, was nothing short of miserable for the marauders. 

Lily had yet to forgive Cassie, refusing to speak to her and giving her nothing but the cold shoulder whenever they found themselves in close proximity to one another. 

To say Cassie and Marlene missed their best friend was an understatement. 

Lily's silent treatment had created a thick tension between the three girls, an unmoving cloud of unnerving silence and cold glares which seemed to be impossible to lift, at least it seemed that way to Cassie.

Marlene had tried countless times to rekindle the trio's friendship, to no prevail. She was getting desperate, her patience for Lily thinning rapidly. 

The remaining marauders were no different from Marlene, though while she took a more sensitive and cautious approach, the four Gryffindor boys had resorted to trying anything and everything to cheer Cassie up. After all, if one marauder's unhappy, the rest of them are too. 

By the end of the week, Cassie had completely given up on trying to win Lily's forgiveness, so instead she spent her Friday slumped over her desk, mindlessly taking notes during class, ignoring all her friends at lunch, and sulking off in the Hufflepuff common room, curled up in the soft love-seat under her favorite window, an old muggle novel sitting open on her lap; though she hadn't exactly been reading it...

When Cassie didn't come down for dinner, Marlene's patience had vanished and she marched purpousfully over towards the Gryffindor table, fury etched into every delicate feature on her round face. It was quite an odd sight to see someone who looked so incredibly innocent hold so much anger in her heart. Though by now, the whole school was well aware of the blonde's short temper. 

Much to the dissapointment of Marls, Lily wasn't at dinner either, and so Marlene let out an aggravated huff as she slumped down into the seat next to Sirius. 

The four Gryffindors looked at her curiously before James raised an eyebrow at her, prompting her to start talking. 

She let out a quiet sigh and sat up straighter, propping her elbows on the wooden table. "We have to do something about Cass."

"She's not at dinner..." 

"Great observation Lupin," Marlene muttered sarcastically.

Remus scowled. 

"Is she in the common room then?" James asked. 

Marlene shrugged, "that's where I left her but who knows where the fuck she is now."

"Is she gonna be okay? She's been kinda off this week but she doesn't usually miss meals," Sirius frowned. 

"That's what I came to talk to you four about actually." 

"Oh, I thought you came over looking for Evans so you could tell her off for ignoring Cassie," Remus offered. 

"Yeah but she's not here so..."

James looked around wearily, clearing his throat quietly, breaking the awkward silence that lingered in the air. "So..." 

"She ate lunch right?" Peter asked, his voice soft. 

Marlene nodded. 

"What do we do then? We've been trying to cheer her up but I don't really think its working," Sirius frowned. 

"I'm not really sure but you guys are her best mates, and as much as I tease her for it, she really does love you guys...like a bloody lot."

"But what _can_ we do?" James asked. 

"Ugh, aren't you guys always up to stuff? Get her to do a prank or something, get her mind off Lily," Marlene groaned. 

"You know," Sirius began, "for someone trying to convince us to help their friend, you sure know how to be an arse about it McKinnon."

She scowled. " _Our_ friend. And if you don't shut it I'm gonna rip out your throat and feed it to you."

"You sure you're a Hufflepuff?"

"Wanna find out?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

She grinned coyly. "I don't think you want to know, Black."

"Should we go find her?" Remus asked suddenly, cringing internally at the eagerness of his voice. 

"Nah, let her sulk," Marlene shrugged. 

Remus swallowed quickly. "But what if she wants to talk about it or something?"

"Why do you all the sudden care so much, huh?" Marlene challenged, her eyebrows raised accusingly at the lanky brunette sitting opposite her. 

"Oh I er-I'm just worried for her...I mean she wasn't really acting like herself today. I mean she didn't even seem _interested_ in Care of Magical Creatures and it's her _favorite_ class!" He rambled. _Nice_ _save_ _Moony_.

Marlene eyed the four boys suspiciously before getting up out of her seat and heading back over to the Hufflepuff table. She would be _damned_ if she had to stay around those four idiots any longer than she had to.

***

As expected, reading some old dusty romance novel got boring real quick, and Cassie found herself at the edge of the forbidden forest, the evening sun peeking through the leaves softly, casting a pink glow upon the brush below. 

A warm feeling of familiarity washed over Cassie as she took a few small steps into the woods, her chocolate curls morphing into a pale pink color that could surely compete with the sunset just above the treetops covering her. 

Originally she wanted to go for a walk in the forbidden forest to clear her head and figure out the whole Lily situation, though as she wandered around the tall trees, the welcoming aroma of wood and grass engulfing her, it became clear to her that one evening not spent on racking her brain for ways in which she could apologize wouldn't be _too_ harmful. _Rig_ _ht?_

And so, with a newfound sense of false clarity, Cassie resumed her aimless wandering, her hair returning to its natural warm brown. 

The autumn leaves crunched quietly under her feet, the gentle evening breeze ruffling through her curls gingerly. 

As she walked in silence, a dangerous thing silence is, her mind began to flutter back to the events that led her to this point, how could she be so cruel as to _punch_ someone? And blimey was it a good punch. 

_You're just as bad as him._

There it was again. 

That fucking voice. 

_"Can't you just leave me alone?"_ She thought bitterly, a sour taste lingering on her tongue.

_You're just as horrible as him. You know it's true._

_"But it's not I would never-"_

_Don't you think that's what he said once before? He would 'never'._

_"But I really would never I mean it was just a stupid punch and he was being a downright git..."_

_You sound just like him now._

_Placing the blame on the victim now are we?_

_Pathetic._

_At least **he** had the right idea to realize what he did was wrong._

_"But he...I'm not like him."_

_Aren't you though?_

_You look just like him. Your poor mother who you look nothing alike. Don't you ever wonder how she must feel to look into your eyes and see the eyes of a **monster** staring right back at her?_

_Don't you see it?_

_You'll turn out just like him won't you?_

_"No."_

_No?_

_Are you sure?_

_"Yes."_

_How can you be so sure? Your mother isn't._

_She sees the face of a monster doesn't she?_

_But now...now when she sees the face of a monster it won't be his monster. No, it will be **your** monster staring right back at her, bearing its sharp teeth, ready to pounce, ready to **kill**. _

_"Stop! I'm nothing like him! He's gone he's...he's..."_

_Oh. You really think he's gone forever don't you? How sweet._

_"Shut up! Just shut the fuck up okay!?"_

_What's next? You have his temper don't you?_

_"No. I don't."_

_You have his punch down just right though-_

"Enough! Go away! I'm done with you!" She seethed, her hands balled up into fists at her side, her knuckles white and her hair a mix of a violent crimson color and a pale grey color. 

_Fuck._

_I'm just like him._

***

The walk back through the forest and up to the castle was completely and utterly dreadful. Hadn't she learned her lesson by now _not_ to go wandering about the castle grounds at dark? Surely she ought to know by now. 

The Hufflepuff common room was unusually empty and...dark. 

Cassie scrambled in through the small wooden opening and fumbled blindly about in darkness of the common room before managing her way up to her dorm, careful not to wake the sleeping girls which resided within. 

Silently, she climbed over to her bed which (much to her immense pleasure), was seated directly under the only window in the dorm room, allowing for the soft light of the moon to shine through the glass, illuminating her small corner slightly. 

With all the strength she could muster, she forced her tired eyes closed and allowed herself the sweet relief of sleep, welcoming the thought with open arms. 

Cassie's dreamless slumber was shortly interrupted, however, by a soft tapping sound coming from outside the window. 

She stifled a groan in her pillow before turning on her side and sitting up on her bed, the old mattress creaking slightly at the shift of her weight. 

She supposed it would be much wiser to ignore the noise and drift back off to sleep, or perhaps to investigate the noise with her wand held high, ready for any attack that might surprise her. 

But alas, Cassie was tired, and she never really had much common sense when she was tired. 

So, with no wand in hand, Cassie cautiously stumbled over the edge of her bed, leaning off it slightly so she could peer out of the window. 

Nothing. 

She shrugged, could've been a branch or something, and turned back around, rolling onto her side, the mattress creaking once again with the added weight of her body.

And just as she closed her eyes, she heard it again. That dreadful tapping sound that seamed to be taunting her. 

Aggravated, Cassie shot up, wand in hand this time, and lunged towards the window, straining her tired eyes for any sign of the culprit. 

She waited for a moment before reaching over to the edge of the window and cracking it slightly. Why? She had no fucking idea but it felt like the right thing to do she supposed. 

And...nothing. Bloody nothing. 

She crawled into bed once more, closing her eyes for the fourth time that night, when a soft tickling sensation disturbed her. 

She shot up in her bed, her blanket slipping off of her and gathering at her waist. 

Furiously, she ripped the blanket back off of her legs, tossing the crumpled fabric to the foot of her bed. She grabbed hold of her wand, muttering a soft _'Lumos'._ The light from her wand was much brighter than she had anticipated, momentarily blinding her, but it served its purpose and she was able to look fully around herself in search of the odd tickling sensation. 

If it's a fucking spider...

Luckily for Cassie, there was no spider crawling around under her sheets, instead a small bright green creature snuggled itself on her pillow, its skinny body curled up into a small ball. 

_Oh._ Cassiethought _. A bowtruckle. How the fuck did a bowtruckle get-oh. The window._

Softly, she reached a hand out towards the small stick-like creature, allowing it to climb onto her hand and up her arm, nestling itself comfortably in the crook of her shoulder, cuddling in her thick curls. 

And for the first time that day, Cassie smiled. 

"Hello? You're quite cuddly aren't you?" She asked, her voice quiet as to not wake the other girls. 

The bowtruckle didn't respond, instead it nestled itself deeper into her neck, causing her to let out an involuntary giggle at the strange sensation. 

"What should I call you?" She asked, craning her neck to look at the lime green creature. 

She sighed softly as she laid back down on her bed, pulling the covers back over her and allowing herself to succumb to the welcoming feeling of sleep, her limbs finally relaxing and her breath evening as she laid there, all too happy to have met an actual bowtruckle. A very cuddly bowtruckle. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hate this chapter im sorry guys


	4. Letters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A series of letters between Cassie and her mum

***

Dear Mum,

Hi mum! I know you're really busy right now but I just wanted to say I miss you and love you and all that other sappy stuff. Write when you can!

Much love,

Cassiopeia. 

***

My darling Cassie,

I'm _so so sorry_ it took me this long to reply. I've just been swamped with work and well you know, over here and I haven't been given the chance to write a reply back to you. 

How's school going? Your letter was so very short and I know you hate it when I worry but I'm your mother-it's my job to worry. 

How are your friends? Staying out of trouble I hope? Though with friends like yours I don't have much faith you haven't already gotten a detention. 

How's Remus? That poor boy's always sick isn't he? Let me know if my limited knowledge as an ex-healer can be of any use to him! 

Anyways, things are going smoothly over here. I hope to be home by next week. I'll 100 percent be home in time for Christmas so don't worry about that, love.

Stay in school, don't do drugs, don't get pregnant blah blah blah.

So much love,

_Penelope S. Waters_

***

Mum,

It's alright! I know how busy you are!

School's going alright, you were right about this year being so much harder since it's the O.W.Ls this year (ugh so much homework I might die!)

I find it very rude you think so little of me that you assumed I've already received a detention! For your information I **haven't**. My friends are doing great! Yes, even Remus, and no mum he's not always sick. 

I'm glad to hear you'll be home soon! I miss you so much, it's been so sad not being able to call you using the phone box in Hogsmeade... 

Love,

Your favorite daughter _Cassiopeia L. Waters_

***

Mum,

I haven't heard from you in a while is everything okay?

Please write back soon!

Love,

Cassiopeia L. Waters

***

Cassie,

I'm sorry I haven't been writing very often. I hope you can understand that it's just so difficult to find a moment to sit down and write to you. I love you. Please don't worry, everything is fine I'm just very busy. I'm not sure when I'll be able to come home, sometime before Christmas but I don't know how far away it'll be. 

Stay safe please. You mean the world to me. 

I love you with my whole heart.

Love,

Mum.

***

Mum,

In that last letter you said not to worry but the stuff you wrote is making me worry. A lot. What do you mean you won't be able to come home soon? You're staring to worry me mum.

Can we talk face to face? Or over the phone? I need you.

If you don't reply I will fly over to America myself!

I love you so much write back please!

Yours,

Cassie

***

Mum,

Hi um is everything alright? Is this address still where you're staying?

Write back please.

Love,

Cass

***

Mum,

We really need to talk. Can you send me the number you're using so I can call you from the phone box in Hogsmeade? I miss you...

-Cassie 

***

Mum,

Write back to me. I need to know you're okay. I love you.

-Cassiopeia L. Waters

***

Cassie,

My darling angel, I'm sorry to have to do this but you have to stop writing to this address. I know you have a lot of questions and I wish I could answer them I really do, but it isn't safe and that's all you need to know. 

I'll be home as soon as I can, I love you with my whole heart. 

It's very important that you don't tell anyone where I am, what I'm doing, or repeat anything I have said to you in person or through paper. I need you to be strong, for me. 

Don't try to contact me, I'll get a hold of you once it's safe for me to. Don't worry, I can handle myself I'm an auror for Godric's sake! 

I love you more than the whole entire world and I'm so sorry. I wish I could speak to you. Don't do anything stupid, okay?

-Mum

***

Lily,

I need you. RR at 7. Please. 

-Cass


	5. Lily

***

The silence surrounding her was unbearable. Of course, what could you expect while waiting alone in the middle of the room of requirement? 

Cassie certainly wasn't expecting to be waiting for half an hour. 

And she certainly wasn't expecting Lily to show up with another person hooked on her arm. 

_Fuck_. 

And Lily certainly wasn't expecting to walk into the room of requirement with Sirius Black clinging onto her like a scared puppy. 

And yet, here they were. 

"Sirius?"

"...yes?"

Cassie frowned, furrowing her brows as she glanced between her two friends. "What are you doing here? I have to talk to Lily."

"Yeah and she told us she was going to meet you, said something about a note or whatever," Sirius shrugged, taking a few steps further into the room, "and you've been acting really off I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine." She replied instantly, her gaze fixed on Lily. 

"Oh yeah my bad, you're totally fine," he rolled his eyes, his arms falling off of Lily's as he advanced towards Cassie. 

"Lily?"

"Yeah?"

"Why did you bring him?" Cassie asked, her voice laced with confusion and hurt. 

Sirius coughed, bringing the attention back to him. "I'm right here."

Cassie and Lily both rolled their eyes before returning back to their staring match, their gaze fixed intently on each other. 

Lily was the first to break the silence, something both Sirius and Cassie were incredibly grateful for. 

"What did you need to talk about? I er I know I haven't really been the greatest friend-"

Sirius snorted. 

"But I, um it sounded important, so..."

Cassie paused for a moment, her expression faltering as she glanced hesitantly over to Sirius. 

"Cass?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay?" Lily's voice was so full of concern and love that Cassie found she was having an extremely hard time holding back her tears. 

She really fucking missed Lily. 

"I miss you," she whispered. 

Lily frowned, "Cass-"

"You can't tell anyone."

Sirius frowned, his eyebrows pinched. "Cass, what's going on?"

She swallowed back the lump in her throat and took a few hesitant steps away from the pair and towards the old wooden coffee table. Shakily, she picked up the letters her mother had sent her over the past weeks and walked back to the center of the small room where Lily and Sirius were standing, their demeanor much more serious and concerned than before. Cassie could practically feel the confusion radiating off of them. She pushed down all her uncertain thoughts whisking through her clouded mind and handed Lily the stack of letters. 

Lily stared down at the letters in her hand for a second before glancing curiously back up to her friend. 

"Read them."

Furrowing her brows in confusion, Lily's hands delicately opened the first envelope and pulled an old, crinkled piece of parchment out of it. 

Quickly, Lily read the first letter and handed it to Sirius before moving onto the next one. Her lips were pursed into a thin line as her eyes darted frantically across the pages, analyzing the words before her. 

It went on like this for a few minutes. Lily would read one of the letters and then immediately hand it to Sirius, neither saying a single word. 

And it was quite, too quiet. The distant sound of the fire crackling and the shuffling of papers graced Cassie's ears as she watched her friends intently, scanning their faces for the slightest flicker of emotion. She couldn't stand it; not knowing what was going on inside their heads. She couldn't stand the uncertainty of the whole situation. And even though she couldn't stand the predicament she found herself in, she couldn't deny the feeling of relief that washed over her. It felt as if she had been carrying the whole world on her frail shoulders and now, the burden has been lifted even if only just slightly. The weight of the letters relinquishing their hold of her. Now, the pain and uncertainty that she despised so much has been shared with her friends. She felt as if she could finally breathe. 

If only that was enough. 

She glanced back up at the faces of her dearest friends, an unusual feeling settling in her stomach. She couldn't stand it anymore. She wanted them to say something, anything. She _needed_ them to say something. She couldn't stand the silence anymore. So, with a sharp intake of her breath she snapped Lily and Sirius out of their respective dazes, bring the attention back to her, back to the letters, back to her mother. 

It didn't take Lily long to collect herself and her thoughts and fling herself onto Cassie, enveloping the smaller girl in a bone crushing hug. 

Cassie was caught off guard at the sudden contact but after a moment she felt herself relax and lean into the hug, wrapping her arms around Lily's shoulders and burrowing her face in the crook of her neck, ginger hair tickling her cheeks but she didn't mind. She would never mind. 

After a few moments, the two girls broke apart. Cassie felt cold. She looked back up at Lily, her emerald eyes swarming with emotions that Cass couldn't hope to decipher. 

"I'm sorry," Lily croaked. 

Cassie smiled sadly, "I know."

"No. I-I'm sorry for... for everything. I've been a shit friend and you... you've been dealing with all this shit! I can't believe I... oh god I'm a horrible friend! I haven't been there for you and you needed me! I wasn't even the one to talk to you first! I mean I was just...oh I don't know! I was just hurt that you-that you would be so... so... violent? Towards him. I mean I expect that behavior from the boys but you... you've never really been mean to him, I mean you don't even use that horrid nickname the boys use! It just... I think it just came as a shock, you know? I just... what I really want to say is I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for being a complete arse and I'm sorry for your shit dad and now I'm sorry about your mom. I'm sorry about that time in third year when we both had a crush on Frank and I didn't talk to you for a week because he laughed at one of your jokes. I'm sorry for that day in first year when I was mad you got a higher mark than me in Transfiguration so I gave James the password to the Hufflepuff common room and then they set a bunch of frogs lose and all the other Hufflepuffs blamed you for giving them the password even though it was me and I never told anyone, well I guess I'm telling people _now_ but-"

"Lily!" Cassie yelled, her amusement and disbelief evident in her tone. 

Lily hesitated, her cheeks turning a rosy color, "yeah?"

"It's okay."

"But-"

"No! Lily it's okay I forgive you just... just shut up and come here," Cassie smiled, pulling the redhead into another hug, the sound of Sirius' bark-like laughter interrupting their heartfelt moment. 

He shook his head in amusement, his dark hair falling into his face. "You guys are something else."

"Oh come here!" Cassie laughed, motioning for Sirius to join their hug. 

With a large, lopsided grin plastered on his face, Sirius came running up to the two girls and launched himself on top of them, sending the three of them to the floor into a fit of hearty laughter. Laughter that no one has heard from Cassie in over a month. Marlin he missed that sound. 

***

No one questioned the sudden change between Lily and Cassie. Seeing the two fifth years laughing to themselves in the furthest corner of the library, whispering to each other during class, and saving each other seats in the great hall, felt like a breath of fresh air for the students at Hogwarts. Life could resume again now that the balance has been restored. But most of all, the marauders were happy to have their fifth member back. No one wanted to mention the oddly quick shift in their dynamic out of fear they might mess it up. And so, for the next couple of weeks, everyone bit their tongue and let the two friends rekindle their dying friendship. 

On one particular Thursday, Sirius couldn't keep his eyes off of Cassie. He was watching her like he was anticipating her to break down and lose it at any moment. And Remus wanted to know why. So, after their normal rambunctious dinner at the Gryffindor table surrounded by their friends and their favorite Hufflepuff, Sirius and Remus found themselves whispering heatedly to each other outside of the portrait of the Fat Lady. 

"Padfoot! Will you just shut up and talk to me!?" Remus snapped, his voice low and harsh, cutting into Sirius like a dagger. 

He groaned, throwing up his arms dramatically, "you're really full of it tonight aren't you?"

"The hell is that supposed to mean!? You're the one who's been staring at Cassie all bloody day like she was about to drop dead or something! Just tell me what's going on Sirius!"

"I-I haven't been staring at her all day..."

"Yes you have. Every. Single. Class."

"Nothing's going on!" Sirius protested. 

Remus rolled his eyes. "Oh sure there's _nothing_ going on with Cass!"

"I don't know what you want me to say."

"The truth!"

"There is no truth!"

"Yes there is just tell me!"

"It's not mine to tell!" Sirius yelled, his anger bubbling to the surface, his hands clenching into fists at his side. 

Remus froze, eying the raven haired boy in front of him. "What do you mean it's not your's to tell?"

"I-nothing. Just leave it Moony. Please."

"No. I know something's been going on with Cassie for like the past two months. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out."

"Look. I...I don't think I'm supposed to tell you..."

"Why the hell not? I'm her b... best friend..."

"Uh huh," Sirius snickered quietly. "Look, Moony I..."

"Please. I just want to make sure she's okay."

"I know."

"So?"

"So what?"

"Are you gonna tell me?"

"I-I don't know I think you should ask her. I wasn't even supposed to know but I kinda made her tell me. Do you remember that day me and Lily left dinner early?"

"Yeah?"

"Well do you remember how Lily said she got a note from Cass and then I was all like 'oh cass? I'm coming'?"

"...Yes?"

"Okay well we went to the room or requirement and she was there... she was a mess and well she wanted me to leave at first but you know how she's way too nice? Well she didn't wanna be mean I think, so I got to stay and she gave us..."

"Gave you what Padfoot? Is she in trouble? This still doesn't explain why you were staring at her today like she was about to break!"

"I... She got a letter today..."

"And?"

"Look Remus I _really_ think _you_ should ask her yourself. It's...it's not my place..."

"Sirius-"

"Night Moony!"

And with that, Remus was left alone in the middle of the corridor, a thousand thoughts running through his head, each worse than the last. He couldn't take it. He had to talk to her. He _had_ to. 

So, without so much as a second thought, Remus took off down the stairs, his lanky legs aiding him in reaching his destination in under ten minutes. He took a shaky breath as he slowed his pace and walked purposefully towards the Hufflepuff common room. He raised his hand and knocked gingerly on the old wooden barrel, his knuckles colliding with the soft birch wood. 

Remus stood there for a moment, his fingers drumming against his thigh, his head whipping around himself dangerously. Then, the barrel cracked open, the warm yellow glow casting down upon his scarred face. 

He smiled softly, the left side of his mouth curling upwards slightly higher than the left. But before he could say anything, the door slammed shut in his face. The warmth of the common room dispersing into the air around him, leaving him cold and confused. He heard the distant muffled sounds of a few yells and frantic footsteps before the door opened again. Standing in front of him was the very person he had come to see, dressed head to toe in sweatpants and a silk black tank top with a hint of lace on the neckline. Her dark curls were thrown up into a very messy bun that sat at the crown of her head. She was holding her toothbrush in between her lips and her brows were furrowed in confusion at the sight of Remus past curfew. 

He snapped himself out of his daze, now really wasn't the time. 

"Remmy?" She asked, her voice tired and hoarse. She grabbed the toothbrush out of her mouth and let her hand holding it fall to her side. She closed the common room door and leaned against it, looking back up at him. His hair was disheveled and his cheeks were flushed. He was still in his uniform but he was missing his red and gold tie and the first few buttons of his white collard shirt were unbuttoned. His grey sweater was crinkled around him messily and his hands fidgeted by his sides. _Oh Merlin._

"Uh hi," he smiled sheepishly, looking everywhere but at her. 

"Um hi? What are you doing outside of the Hufflepuff common room at 9:30?" She asked, her face resting into a soft smile, one that seemed to be reserved for him and him alone. 

He shook his head slightly, his sandy brown curls falling into his eyes. "I er I talked to Sirius..."

Her face paled. "Oh?"

"Yeah and I just um I just wanted to er check on you. He didn't tell me anything but he kinda implied something was going on, and uh, you don't have to-er you don't have to tell me but I just wanted you to know I'm here... Yeah..."

"It's nothing special...just I haven't gotten any mail from my mom in a while. She's in America and well...Um I can talk more about it tomorrow just not...not right now," she smiled. 

He looked at her for a moment, his gaze lingering on her large doe-like eyes before nodding slowly. "Okay but if anything changes or you just want to talk will you promise to come to me? You know I'm not nearly as bad with emotions as Peter or James."

Her face lit up and she felt the roots of her hair turning a pale pink color...or perhaps violet. She wasn't quite sure. 

"Thank you Remus. I promise and that means more than you'll ever know."

"Hm, it seems your hair might be giving you away," he snickered. 

"Huh? Isn't it pink?" She asked, tilting her head in confusion. 

"Oh that's what you think?"

He was far too amused. "...Yes?"

"You know I don't see this color often," he smirked, leaning the side of his arm against the door and looking down at the shorter girl in front of him, "I can't remember what it mean though."

"Oh you're having way too much fun right now," she teased, looking up at him with an eyebrow raised. 

"Am I?"

"Yeah. You kinda are."

"It suits you."

"What does? The color?"

"Yeah," he smiled. 

She rolled her eyes, "so are you gonna tell me what color it is?"

"Nope."

"Remus!"

"Cassie!"

"Ugh your just as bad as Padfoot and Prongs I swear."

"Hey! I'll have you know I'm _much_ more mature than those two!"

"Yeah? Is that why you've already abused every single one of your powers as prefect? The first term isn't even over!" She laughed. 

"Oi! I haven't abused _every_ power!" He protested, his smile betraying his defensive words. 

She laughs. "Uh huh."

"Hey! I'm not the one who sneaks into the forbidden forest every day!" 

"I-how did you know about that?"

"The map."

"Oh fuck me I forgot about that stupid ass map!"

"You kiss your mother with that mouth?"

"No but I'll kiss yours."

"Oh, you're gonna take it there huh?"

"Yup."

"Two can play at that game Red."

"Oh really? I wanna see you _try_ and insult my mum. You're too much of a sweetheart."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Uh your mom..."

She started laughing, doubling over while clutching her stomach. 

"I told you," she smirked. 

He rolled his eyes, a soft smile playing on his lips. "Uh huh."

"You really are a rubbish prefect you know."

"Oh believe me, I know," he chuckled. 

Cassie could've sworn her heart exploded. Standing there, the light orange glow of the torch-lit corridor caressing his face, enveloping him in an aura of laughter and warmth. 

He stopped laughing and looked back over to Cassie. Their eyes met and she felt her cheeks flushing, forcing her to break away first and turn her gaze to the floor. 

Hesitantly, he reached his calloused hand out and gently grabbed her chin, lifting her face up slowly to meet his. He retracted his hand, his eyes never leaving hers, and she felt cold. The skin which he had touched longed for the warmth he provided. She looked up at his face, an unreadable expression clouding his eyes. And standing there, letting go of all the worries that plagued her daydreams and caused her many restless nights, she felt herself relaxing. She felt her muscles loosening and her lips settling into a soft smile. An unusual feeling crawled its way into her stomach as she stared at his face, taking in every small detail, every scar, every freckle, every imperfection that made him all the more beautiful. That's what he was, beautiful. 

His eyes were soft and his voice was quiet as he spoke. "Cassie, what happened with your mom."

Her face fell, but she knew she had to tell him. He deserved to know. "She's not in America for work."

His face fell and he took a careful step closer to her, his eyes filled with confusion and sympathy. 

"She's, well I don't know how much you know about the stuff that's going on with that Voldemort guy."

"Well um, I'm not exactly sure what she's doing in America but I know she's doing stuff involved with the...war... And I've been writing her but she um...she stopped responding and she told me it was dangerous to write to her. That was like a month ago. So um...yeah that's kinda what's been going on and I told Lily 'cause she's always been the best with this kind of shit and Sirius was there so that's how he knows. I'd er I'd rather if you didn't tell James of Peter."

He was silent for a few moments. A few agonizing moments. 

"I'm sorry Cass. I won't tell anyone. I promise."

His words were so full of sincerity and concern. Cassie couldn't stand it. And so, with no hesitation, she flung her arms around him, reaching up on her tip toes and snuggling her face into his chest. She felt her hair change color once again as he wrapped his arms tightly around her, pulling her closer to his body. And for the first time in a long time, Cassie felt a feeling she thought she would never feel again. She felt protected. 


	6. Newt

***

The midday sun was warm against her tan skin, pressing gentle kisses upon her small frame as she skipped down the grassy hills surrounding the black lake. Her dark chocolate curls bounced airily against her shoulders as she made her way down a particularly large hill and over to the rocky shore of the lake. Cassie had always adored the outdoors even from a young age. Her parents could never seem to keep her from wandering out into the woods and exploring all that nature had to offer. Her mother thought she might grow out of her love for the earth and all of it's beautiful creations once she got older; maybe she would spend her time cuddled up in her room reading an old withered book that's spine was cracking from one too may reads. Or maybe, her mother thought, she would spend her time stowed away in the kitchen baking and cooking. And while, her mother's assumptions weren't far off from what Cassie often finds herself enjoying, she couldn't have been more wrong with her assumption that she would ever dislike the outdoors. Cassie knew she would always have a special place in her heart for the simple beauty Mother Nature had to offer. And she knew she would always be able to find solace in the way the trees towered over her protectively, how the vibrant wildflowers littered the earth beneath her feet, how she could always find life flourishing even in the harshest of circumstances. 

So, she often spent the warmer afternoons walking along the perimeter of the Black Lake. In her third year she had found one particularly well hidden clearing of trees along the northern part of the shore, and ever since that day, Cassie had unofficially claimed it as her spot. She knew it would be fairly easy to find her there considering almost every person she was close with had found her hidden under the large weeping willow tree at one time or another. Though, she decided she didn't mind if anyone were to find her today. Maybe some company would be nice. 

Her thoughts were interrupted as she approached the clearing, the late October air nipping at her exposed skin as she ducked under a large branch. Upon straightening her back she was met with the welcoming sight of her favorite place in all of Scotland. The clearing was rather small but she didn't mind. It's size didn't matter for the beauty of it captivated her, drawing her closer to the edge of the water. The long, unkept grass tickled her ankles as she made her way further into the clearing. The sunlight peaked through the opening of the leaves above her, casting odd shadows down upon her. She could feel the roots of her dark curls turning into a pale pink color and he allowed the edges of her full lips to curl into a soft smile. It felt foreign to smile, she supposed it must be because of all the fake ones she had been forcing upon herself recently. She shook her head slightly to rid herself of any negative thoughts, she didn't come all the way out here just to wallow in her own self pity. She looked around herself once more, slowly taking in her surroundings, hoping o commit this exact feeling of warmth to memory. The trees surrounding her were tall, looming over her somewhat intimidatingly. The grass beneath her was littered with weeds and soft colored wild flowers that drew her in almost instantaneously. She couldn't help but be drawn to the lake however, the way the water rippled softly against the shore with each brush of wind. 

She padded over to the edge of the murky water. Without much thought, she took of her shoes, placing them next to the large tree trunk closest to her. She took off her knee high grey socks and gently placed her bare feet into the icy cold water of the Black Lake. A shiver ran up through her body, and while she usually would've retracted her feet from the water as soon as her skin raised into goosebumps, she welcomed the feeling of the cold seeping through her, clawing at every inch of her, forcing her body to reach equilibrium on it's own. She then reached into the pocket of her skirt, fumbling her fingers around in the folds between fabric for a moment before retracting her hand. Sitting in the middle of her palm was the Bowtruckle that she had befriended way back in September when Lily wasn't speaking to her. She had done a wonderful job of keeping her little companion a secret as she was sure she was violating some rule by keeping him in her dorm. She had tried many times to release him into the Forbidden Forest, even spending a good two hours trudging through the forest to find other Bowtruckles that he could be friends with. However, her efforts proved to be futile and after three weeks of begging him to go back to his kind, she decided to adopt him in a way. She couldn't see herself getting rid of the very clingy and cuddly Bowtruckle any time soon, so after much careful consideration she decided upon the name Newt after the famous author Newt Scamander. She had always looked up to the old wizard and seeing as he specialized in magical creatures, the name seemed very fitting. 

Newt crawled around lazily on her hand before deciding to venture further up onto her shoulder. She smiled softly, watching in amusement as he cuddled himself into her hair. 

She stayed like that for a few minutes -or maybe longer, she couldn't really remember- simply peacefully enjoying the weather and letting Newt wander around for a bit, until she began to lose feeling in her toes and decided it would probably be best to head back inside seeing as it would be dark soon and if she stayed out any longer her toes might turn into icicles and fall off her feet. 

***

By the time she reached the castle, the sun had begun to set and her stomach began to rumble unforgivingly loud. She grimaced slightly, the roots of her curls turning a pale yellow out of embarrassment, as she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the window. Her hair which had previously been thrown into a neat ponytail, now fell limp at her shoulders, the hair-tie long gone and probably floating on the surface of the lake. Her uniform was a mess with vibrant grass stains on her knee high socks. Her white button up was wrinkled, poking oddly out of her charcoal grey sweater. Her yellow and black tie was hung loosely around her neck. She paused for a moment in front of the window, attempting to straighten up her appearance slightly, running her fingers through her rat's nest of curls that, at this point, were almost as yellow as her tie. _Great._

With a deep breath, she turned herself back into the direction of the Great Hall and forced her feet to move forward. She would be damned if she missed dinner simply because she was embarrassed of her appearance. So, with as much fleeting confidence she could muster, she made her way through the corridors, stoping only for a moment in the entrance to the Great Hall to calm her frantic heartbeats. She took a few steps into the hall and the familiar sound of students bombarded her ears, bringing a soft smile of content to her cheeks. She made her way over to the Gryffindor table after a short scan of the hall, determining that Marlene was indeed sitting at the Gryffindor table next to Lily instead of her usual spot at the Hufflepuff table. 

Ignoring the few stares and raised eyebrows she was receiving, she took the empty seat in between Marlene and James. She looked around at the two mixed friend groups with furrowed brows trying to decipher why the hell would Lily be voluntarily sitting in a close proximity to James Potter. 

"Alright?" She asked cautiously, not failing to notice the way Remus' eyes flickered from Lily, to Sirius, to Cassie. 

James looked around at the group before him, an unreadable expression plastered on his tan face. "Yeah... we just didn't know where you went..."

"Rolling around in the grass again Cass?" Sirius asked, his tone teasing and slightly... accusing?

Cassie rolled her eyes, a playful smile resting on her lips as she pilled some mashed potatoes onto her porcelain plate. "Where else would I be, Black?"

Sirius smiled lightly at her before squinting his eyes curiously at a spot on her right shoulder. Cassie raised an eyebrow at him. She looked at Remus to start a conversation, only to find that he along with the rest of the group were staring oddly at her right shoulder. 

She cleared her throat awkwardly, the silence was deafening. "Is there something wrong?" She asked hesitantly, examining their individual faces for a hint of an answer. 

Remus was the first to speak, his brows furrowed and his gaze oddly fixed on her shoulder. "Is that-"

"A Bowtruckle?" Marlene finished, her head tilted to the side slightly.

Cassie's breath hitched in her throat and she was sure any hint of yellow to her hair had turned an alarming shade of white. Her mouth felt dry as she slowly looked down to her shoulder where, surely enough, Newt was sitting. She knew he techinically didn't have the facial muscles to _make_ an expression of guilt, but blimey did that little bastard look guilty. 

"Uh...no?" She lied, her eyes wide as she frantically grabbed Newt off of her shoulder and, ignoring his vigorous protests, shoved him into the pocket of her pleated skirt. 

Much to everyone's surprise, Lily started giggling along with Marlene who both seemed to be unable to contain themselves. James' face instinctively lit up at the sound of Lily's laughter, and while Cassie would usually just ignore his overbearing affection for her best friend, she couldn't help nut feel an unusual feeling of... adoration? She couldn't help the small smile that made it's way onto her round cheeks. 

Soon, the rest of the group had morphed into an uncontrollable fit of laughter, seemingly for no reason other than Cassie's blatant lie. 

"Where the hell did you find a Bowtruckle?" Peter asked, his cheeks slightly flushed from laughing. 

Cassie took a few breaths to contain her giggles, her hair now it's natural shade of brown. "Uh, I didn't?"

"You... didn't?" Remus asked, a teasing smirk tugging at his lips. 

"No, I found him in my room one night back in September when, uh, Lily.... you know, was still, erm, mad at me, and I tried to release him a few times but he would never leave so, er, I named him Newt," she smiled sheepishly, reaching into her pocket and gently pulling out the green figure of Newt who was very, very pissed. He nipped at her hand swiftly and crawled up her arm, plopping himself down in the crook of her neck. Cassie let out a quiet yelp when he bit her finger, scarlet blood trickling from the small cut. "Bastard," she muttered under her breath, glaring at the small creature which now laid innocently on her shoulder. 

Marlene leaned forward to get a better look at the creature, in true Hufflepuff nature she had always shared Cassie's love for magical creatures. "Wait, why didn't you tell anyone?" She asked, averting her gaze slightly so she could look at Cassie's face. 

Cassie shrugged. "I'm not really supposed to have a Bowtruckle."

"Is your finger okay?" Remus asked, his eyebrows nit together with worry. 

"It's bleeding!" James exclaimed, grabbing her hand in his and lifting her finger closer to his face. 

Cassie couldn't hold back her laughter at her friends' reactions. "It's just a small cut, I'm fine.It doesn't even hurt I promise," she smiled sincerely. 

"You sure? It look's kind of deep..." Peter asked, his eyes wide and his face pale as he stared fixatedly on the blood that had begun to very gently trickled down her finger and down her sleeve. 

"Wormtail you look a bit peaky, you okay?" Sirius asked with a teasing smirk. 

Peter nodded slowly. "Just not a fan of blood," he gulped. 

Cassie rolled her eyes playfully and shoved a napkin around her right hand to cover the wound from Peter's sensitive gaze.

Lily looked up at Cassie with a curious gleam in her vibrantly green eyes. "Why'd you name him Newt?"

"Newt? What kind of name is that?" Sirius asked, his loud bark-like laughter ringing throughout the hall. 

Cassie rolled her eyes. "Newt, after the author Newt Scamander."

"Newt... Scamander...?" James asked, his head tilted to the side slightly making him look similar to a confused puppy. 

"He wrote Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them," Remus answered absentmindedly, his gaze still fixed on her _slightly_ bloody hand. 

"Yeah, I love that book and I couldn't really decide on a name so..." Cassie explained, the roots of her dark curls morphing into a pale yellow once more. 

Sirius started to laugh, catching the group off guard. "Your hair..."

"Oh shove off, Padfoot!" Cassiopea blushed. 

"Hey, look on the bright side! You match your tie," Marlene snickered.

Cassie simply glared at the two, her hair turning a violent shade of canary yellow that would surely rival her quidditch uniform. Sirius turned in his seat slightly to give Marlene a high-five which she accepted enthusiastically. 

Lily rolled her eyes and crossed her arms with a soft huff, adverting Cassie's attention away from the Hufflepuff and Gryffindor duo. 

"What I'm really curious about," Cassie began, a smirk finding its way onto her lips, "is why on Earth is my dear Lily voluntarily sitting in a close proximity to the lovely James over here?"

"You know Vixen, I've been wondering the same exact thing this whole time," Sirius grinned. 

"You know what I've been wondering?" Lily glared, though the corners of her mouth curled upwards slightly. 

Marlene smirked, turning in her seat to face Lily. "What has our dear Lily been wondering, hm?"

Lily rolled her eyes half heartedly. "Why in God's name do you five have those awful nicknames for each other?" 

Remus and Peter stiffened slightly, their faces going pale. 

Cassie smirked softly before answering. "Why? Jealous?" She teased, earning herself a pointed glare from the redhead. 

"It's our patronuses," James replied, his voice calm and steady. "Pete's is a rat so we call him Wormtail, Sirius' is a dog so we call him Padfoot, mine is a stag so I'm Prongs, and Cassie's is a fox so she's Vixen and Remus calls her Red but he's the only one that does because he's in love with her," he snickered. 

Remus glared at James while the rest of the group giggled quietly to themselves, Sirius' laughter proving to be the loudest as it drew the attention of some of the surrounding students. 

"In my opinion, my nickname is by far the worst possible nickname you lot could've chosen," Peter grumbled, earning a few stray snickers from his friends. 

Sirius grinned. "Oh, come on _Wormy_ , I think your nickname is absolutely _dashing_ ," he teased.

"Oh come off it," Peter glared light-heartedly. 

Marlene's amused expression was replaced by one of confusion as she looked up at James, her eyebrows furrowed. "You didn't say what Remus' patronus was."

"Huh?" James asked, his eyes widening slightly. 

"You explained why you call Peter Wormtail, Cassie Vixen, you Prongs, and Sirius Padfoot, but you never explained why you call Remus Moony or whatever," Marlene explained. 

"You guys call him Moony?" Lily asked, her head tilted to the side slightly. 

Cassie froze for a second, the wheels in her head spinning rapidly, but before she could fabricate an answer, Sirius' voice rung out and broke her train of thought. 

"His patronus is a wolf," Sirius shrugged casually, his attention fixed on the food in front of him. 

Lily seemed satisfied with that answer and, much to the marauders' relief, dropped the subject for the time being. 

***

After dinner, the five Gryffindors bid their goodbyes to Marlene and Cassie and allowed the pair to trudge down to the Hufflepuff common room alone. The walk was spent in a comfortable silence that continued well into the evening as the two girls got ready for bed, neither really sure of what to say to break the silence before it became awkward. 

Luckily for Cassie, Marlene decided to speak first, her soft voice bouncing off the walls of the empty dormitory. "What're you going as to the party?" She asked as she wiggled into a pair of pajama shorts. 

Cassie furrowed her brows, turning around to face Marlene with a confused expression. "What party? Oh! The Halloween party?"

"Yeah, what do you think you're gonna dress up as?"

Cassie thought for a moment before simply shrugging, walking over to the dorm's bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face. "Dunno, I kind of forgot that we had to dress up. What're you going as?" She asked, her voice muffled slightly by the toothbrush that hung limply out of her mouth. 

Marlene rolled her eyes, a hint of a smile creeping on her lips. "The party is this weekend and you forgot we had to wear costumes?" 

"Yeah?"

"Ugh, okay just... oh! Just wear one of my old costumes!" She beamed, rushing over to her trunk excitedly. 

Cassie laughed softly as Marlene threw open the lid to her trunk, rummaging around frantically inside of it. Just as she was about to pull an old Halloween costume out and show it to Cassie, their other two dorm mates waltzed into the room laughing, their conversation dying as they entered the room with raised eyebrows. After rooming with the duo for over four years, Emmaline Vance and Anna Clearwater were well accustomed to walking into their dorm to find much stranger scenes than the one before them, but their curiosity had yet to diminish over the years. 

"Well, good evening?" Anna asked amusedly, flipping her honey blonde hair over once shoulder with a teasing smile. 

Emmaline smiled as she walked further into the dorm, plopping down on her twin sized bed. "Alright girls?" 

Cassie laughed softly before spitting the toothpaste out of her mouth and walking out of the bathroom over to Marlene who was still frantically searching through her battered old trunk. "Marls?" She asked with a teasing smile tugging at the corners of her full lips. 

Marlene mumbled something excitedly under her breath before pulling out what looked to be a short baby blue A-line dress. 

"Here!" She squealed, shoving the costume into Cassie's hands rather roughly. 

Cassie rolled her eyes playfully before walking back into the bathroom to change. She wiggled out of her pajamas and slipped on the dress. The silky blue fabric clung tightly to her curves, framing her body nicely. It poofed out at the bottom, giving her more of an hourglass shape. The fabric was slightly covered by a white apron. She looked at herself in the mirror for a moment, her eyes dancing over every part of her. She started to feel uncomfortable in her own skin, looking at herself with disgust instead of admiration as she had been second prior. She had never found herself breathtakingly beautiful, not the kind of beautiful that Lily was. She never had boys falling to their feet before her and while she knew her beauty didn't come from validation from others, she couldn't help the feeling of jealousy crawl it's way into her heart. 

Shaking her head slightly to rid herself of any negative thoughts, she pushed the bathroom door open and walked out, only to be greeted by a few wolf whistles and clapping coming from the other girls, each clad in their own set of pajamas. Cassie felt herself blush slightly, and she was sure her curls had turned a deep pink color. 

"You look so good!" Anna called as she climbed into her bed, sitting up and resting her back against the mahogany head board. 

Marlene walked over to Cassie with a look of what she assumed to be admiration in her dazzling green blue eyes. She laced her hands on both of Cassie's biceps and squeezed lightly. "Cass, if I were a lesbian I would be so in love with you."

Cassie giggled, the feeling of disgust and jealousy dissapating slightly. "Is this an Alice in Wonderland costume?"

"Yeah, I wore it like two years ago but, damn it looks so much better on you," Marlene whistled. 

"You were thirteen with no boobs and no arse."

"Still," Marlene shrugged. 

Cassie grinned despite herself. "Thanks Marls."

"Anytime _Red_ ," she teased, letting go of Cassie's arms and walking over to her own bed. 

"Oh fuck off!" Cassie laughed, heading back into the bathroom to finish getting ready for bed. 

She heard Marlene grumble something under her breath and let out a soft snicker as she washed her face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rly dont like this chapter im sorry guys

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you like my story this is my first time posting on ao3 n its lowkey rly confusing lol


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